"I tell you, you can pray for anything, and if you believe that you’ve received it, it will be yours." ~ Jesus (Mark 11:24)
Yesterday, as I was getting ready for work, I noticed I had a missed call and new voicemail from Mom. I dialed my mailbox, entered my password, and wondered what the message was about. Her words, "I just wanted you to know that I took Dad to the emergency room, because he was feeling dizzy..." was not what I was expecting. I called her back and ended up talking to Dad. He said he had been feeling dizzy and his right arm and leg were not functioning as they should. They had run several tests already and were waiting for the results.
At work, I carried my phone in my pocket as I waited on tables, praying for Mom, Dad, the hospital staff, and an early end to the stream of customers coming in. As it turned out, customers did not stop coming when I wanted, but my fantastic co-worker knew what was going on and let me stop taking tables so I could leave right at closing.
Half way through the evening, Mom called to say the tests they had done so far had come back clear, and we rejoiced!! Still, they wanted to keep Dad over night and do an MRI in the morning saying they felt he had had a mini stroke. After work, I went down to the hospital with two of my besties to spend time with Mom, Dad, Brad, and Kevin.
I worked again this morning, and around 1pm, Dad called to say he had been discharged and the MRI had shown he had had a mini stroke. Rest and a few more adjustments are in store for him now.
The past 32 hours have been full of uncertainty and peace. I've not known whether to focus on laughing, crying, rejoicing, kneeling in gratitude, begging for healing, or resting in peace. I think I've managed all of the above to some degree and often all rolled into the same moment. So grateful for God's provision and hand on my Daddy's life. Immensely thankful He saw fit to continue blessing our family and this world with him!
Shifting focus a bit: how bout that verse at the beginning of this post? I don't know how often I view that statement as, "If you ask for what you want and believe you will receive it... then you will receive exactly what you ask for." No doubt, in the situation with Dad, I prayed and believed for healing and good results. But in other life circumstances, to what end am I praying and believing? Is what I am asking for truly the best He has for me? Do I know what is best that I can ask for it? It's hard to express the idea that is rolling around in my mind and heart. Instead of asking for what I think I want or need, I want to simply ask for the endurance to run my life's course with a heart of praise, to understand the full meaning of "My grace is sufficient", to acquire an ever deepening understand of I Am, to replace "why me?" with "why not me?", to accept without questioning... realizing that He is in control and will reveal His reasoning in His perfect time. So what am I asking and believing for? To know His truth and to accept and live the abundant life He has planned for me as His child. Will I succeed? His grace is sufficient... "Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will." Romans 12:2
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